Saturday, September 13, 2008

You sure are.

Incidentally, I can vouch for this.

And now, I present 3 scenes, two from today, one from a week or so ago.

1. Ian the Comedy Writer
Scene: Our station wagon. Ian is strapped into his seat; Eric is driving, I am in the passenger seat.

Ian: Knock knock!
(eric and I exchange a look that says, hmmm, this is new.)
Eric: Who's there?
Me: Um, piney? Piney who? (subtext: What? Piney? what the...?)
Ian: A PINEY! And it REALLY SCRATCHES!! (hoots with laughter, which is so contagious that we also start laughing.

It's been more than a week, and we still have absolutely no idea what it means.
And it's gotten a whole lot funnier.

2. Ian the Performer (a monologue.)
Ian and I are at the lakefront in our town. We've eaten our sandwiches, played on the playground for hours, and are now (with more than a modicum of resistance) making our way back to the car. Ian detours up a ramp and onto the huge concrete stage at the lakeside bandshell. I accompany him, to make sure he can't take a header off the front.

Ian: (stages just off-center, all the way downstage, his eyes raking the empty hillside) I am a magic magician! And I am doing a magic show! Which of you kids would like to come up on MY stage?
(Turns to me) No one is coming on my stage.
I shrug - sad but true. Some nights, it's just like that, kid.

2. Ian the Naturalist
A little closer to the car, Ian spots of ducks standing on the shore, a foot or so from the water, grooming and conversing. He steps toward them, and I catch his arm.

me: Not too close, honey.
Ian: But I want to meet the ducks! Can I pet them? They have furry feathers!
me: I don't think they'll let you, Neen. I'm sure they'd jump in the water to get away. They're scared of people getting too close - they're wild animals, after all.

Ian: (pauses to think. Then:) But I am a wild kid!

1 comment:

april said...

omg. i cant wait until luke talks. i need this kind of of comic relief in my house.