Lost weekend

I have no bleeding idea how I am still in this house, still married, still employed, still the legal (I just typed 'Klegal', which made me snort with laughter, though misspelled.) legal guardian of an innocent child.

I have no idea how this darling child did not end up in a foundling basket on the steps of some church. Not, um, MY church, of course. Some other church.

The last few days have been rawthur gruesome around here. Today was much better. Thank God.

The darling child had a little virus, which gave him a mild fever, a near-complete loss of appetite, a vile disposition, and, notably, a green gummy discharge coming out of his EYEBALLS. Lots of naps, lots of baths, lots of wiping of various things, lots of night waking.

Lots of crying.

Oh, good Lord, what a lot of crying. And what a lot of hanging around the house, not exposing people at large to gross gummy eye goo.

We had certainly been exposed to the virus, since I had a throbbing head and more than the usual amount of chills. (Pregnancy seems to have broken my internal thermostat, and I am permanantly freezing. My teeth chatter routinely. So when I get the shivers, it takes me a couple days to suspect I might have a fever, by which time it always subsides.)

As I said, today was far better. The eye goo dried up yesterday, under Daddy's loving
care, and today he was energetic, playful, and famished. Still just a little out of sorts. A certain amount of crying. Me, I am back to the normal amount of freezing, and intermittant, minor headache. (My BFF emailed me with an excellent suggestion - I probably should get my blood pressure checked.)

In retrospect - now that he's better and my head hurts less and he's going back to daycare tomorrow morning - I frankly cannot believe what a huge baby I've been about this.

That, in fact, is an insult to babies. (And who do babies have to speak up for them in matters such as these? There's no Baby Anti-defamation League...)

Sorry, digression. What I mean is, is my happiness so fragile that all it takes to crush it is a couple days with a demanding toddler?

Well, apparently.

Friday night, after said toddler was asleep, I had the chance to run out and pick up some groceries. As I buttoned my coat, Eric looked deep into my eyes and said "Just...come back. Okay? Come back? Please?"

And as you can tell, I did. Either this speaks well of me, or else my spirit is finally broken.